Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month: For the Men in Our Lives
Men’s mental health awareness month is a time intended to bring awareness to the stigmas that men encounter when facing mental health concerns, which of course range widely in severity and prevalence depending on the individual. Some common concerns include depression, anxiety, addiction, and PTSD; issues that almost any human being would struggle to process and work through on their own, and yet despite the suffering that results from these challenges, men are less likely to seek counseling when compared to women. According to a national survey conducted in 2019 by the CDC, 24.7% of women sought some type of mental healthcare in response to similar issues, as opposed to only 13.4% of men. This trend becomes even more complex when demographic factors such as age, race, ethnicity, and sexual orientation are considered. Another CDC survey reported that non-Hispanic white men were the most likely to seek mental health treatment compared to other male populations, with AAPI groups being the least likely to seek support. Unfortunately, this apprehension to seek support for mental challenges results in men taking their own lives far too often, as while females attempt suicide more often, males are far more likely to die from it.
What is the reason for this reluctance to seek support, and how can we help the men in our lives feel as though they can receive the care they need? Current research suggests that much of this apprehension stems from how males in many cultures are encouraged to be independent, stoic, and strong providers from a young age, which then leads to the perception that expressing certain emotions contradicts these values. Unfortunately, anger is commonly taught to be an appropriate response to strong feelings, which can make it difficult for friends and loved ones to offer support to men who simply don’t know how to express their emotions in a healthy way. Even trained professionals sometimes struggle to build relationships with male clients for this, and among other reasons. This does not mean that men are therefore incapable of benefiting from professional support and it certainly does not mean that they are undeserving. Rather, the fact that men often struggle to work through such mental challenges suggests that more effort is needed to make seeking treatment approachable and accessible.
Of course, many men are uncomfortable seeking help from those around them, and some may not even have a support network to call on. For those who would prefer to tackle their mental challenges individually, journaling is a widely practiced and supported way of processing difficult thoughts and feelings while still retaining privacy. There is no right or wrong way to journal, but if your goal is to improve your ability to express feeling, the following formula may help: “I felt _____ because _____”. This appears simple, but can be challenging as emotions are often illusive and difficult to describe, even for trained professionals. Simple meditation and breathing exercises are also reported to be effective in helping to manage anxious or depressing thoughts, and instructional videos are widely available on the internet.
As for what can be done at home, with the men and boys that populate your lives, begin using feeling words with young children, and allow anger to be expressed through appropriate outlets like sports, music, or other creative activities. If a man comes to you and expresses sadness or fear, meet them with compassion and remind them that they are even stronger for having the courage to speak up about their struggles. This can be difficult, as many of us are so used to seeing the men around us remain closed off from such expressions, which may result in some feelings of initial discomfort. However, this should not prevent us from offering our support when these situations occur. While shame is often experienced by men when they express emotion, we can instead convey that vulnerability does not convey weakness, it conveys humanity.
